Law Offices of M. Michelle Erich
PERSONAL ADOPTION SERVICES

Adoptive Parent Questions
You want to adopt a baby, but you wonder ...

1. How does independent adoption work? Most birth mothers personally select adopting parents by independent adoption. The Adoptive parents may be located through a state licensed attorney or other facilitating organization. The attorney/facilitator, such as Michelle Erich, is able to help birth mothers and the adopting parents find each other, somewhat like a modern day match maker.

2. Is there another way to adopt? Besides independent adoptions, which comprise about 90% of all adoptions, about 10% of adoptions are arranged by state licensed adoption agencies. The agency ultimately makes the placement decision, rather than the birth mother.

3. What is an open adoption? It is just another name for independent adoption. There is no one blue print for the degree of openness. Pictures are typical. Michelle will discuss possibilities such as pictures, letters, phone calls, or meetings.

4. Are adoption records confidential? Yes, adoptions are highly confidential. They are not listed on web sites or in any information source available to the general public.

5. Will I meet the birth mother? Certainly, usually in person, occasionally by teleconference. Birth mothers like to ask questions. You may be asked about your family, background, diet, discipline theories, hobbies, sports, religion, activities - you name it!

6. What information about me will she get? California law requires that the birth parent(s) be provided facts regarding any significant health issues, prior marriages, other children regardless of age, and disclosure of all members of the household where the child will live. The justice department will screen finger prints on all adults in the home. Additionally, information must be offered as to the legal name, age, race, religion, occupation, area of residence, and education level of an adopting parent.

7. Will she pick me? Just be yourself and prepare a good profile with happy pictures and lots of information. It is good to express your respect for her and the difficult adoption decision she has made to to best serve her child by providing a future with you.

8. What information will I be given about the parents? Everything your birth mother provides. We take a detailed medical back ground and information about the father, too.

9. What about the father's rights? They depend on many factors including the role of the baby's father in the birth mother's life. Were they living together or married? Was he a one-night stand or unknown? The statutes provide for each of these situations.

10. When can I take my baby home? Usually when the birth mother is released from the hospital, so is the baby, to you. tWhile the baby is in teh hospital you will be allowed, if the birth mother consents, to begin making decisions and having bonding time. The birth mother can spend time with the baby, too, while in the hospital.

11. Will I be able to name my baby? Of course! You will complete a new birth certificate as the adoption is completed.

12. Will the birth parents meet my child someday? The child will need your permission until reaching the age of 18. After that, i f they want to, and the child wants to, it is a possibility.

13. Should we tell my child he/she is adopted? That is your choice. The prevailing view is that this truth should be shared sooner, rather than later. Michelle asks the birth mother to write a letter to the child explaining her dicision. You can give it to the child when/if you think you should. A former birth mother e-mailed Michelle with delight when her son, a 15 year old adoptee, had his adoptive mom request pictures of her and of his half-siblings after reading the letter she had written to him so many years earlier.

14. Will I provide obstetrical care? You will want your baby to recieve prenatal care on a regular basis; sometimes that responsibility falls on the adopting parents. It will depend on the birth mother's individual circumstances.

15. Will there be other expenses for the birth mother? You may need to assist with pregnancy related expenses, as itemized by California law, such as food, clothing, and shelter, and transportation, as well as medical care. Some mothers need nothing; others are homeless and jobless. Michelle can usually estimate expenses until the baby is born and for a reasonable time thereafter before you make a choice to accept the adoption plan.

16. Can I help the birth mother go to college? Your generosity may need to be held in check! It is vitally important to avoid even the appearance that a baby is being exchanged for any financial gain. Always ask Michelle first!

17. What is the average cost of an adoption? The average cost, including birth mother expenses is currently between $10,000 - $25,000. The final costs in Michelle's practice have varied considerably, primarily depending on birth mother needs and birth father issues. An estimate is given to you before you agree to the adoption plan.

18. How risky is adopting? Parental rights are usually terminated about 30-35 days after the child is born. Until the final hearing, approximately six months after filing for adoption, nothing can be guaranteed, but with Michelle's track record, your odds of a successful adoption are as good as they come!

We hope that you will find our information useful. Our goal is to provide the top quality services in a kind and loving fashion. We would love answering any other questions you have! Call today!